anythings.org

Site update: Because I so often find things I want to blog about, but lack the time, I have start bookmarking them on my del.icio.us account for your reading pleasure. They are also viewable here, or by clicking the “Articles of interest” tab above.

Life update: I am very pleased to announce that I have been accepted to graduate school at San Francisco State University! I will be starting my Master’s degree in Women’s Studies this fall. I can’t wait to be back in college again!

Update update: Also, an update on… well… updates: I have been selected to be on a jury for a very long trial. I usually do my updates during my breaks at work, but I obviously can’t do that at the court house. I had jury duty all of last week, and it was incredibly boring. I’ll have updates this week, but things will be slow March 24-28 and April 7-11.

I thought I would take a moment to step off my soap box and blog about Missy Higgins, an awesome musician from Australia who has a lot to say about life, love, and all the other miscellany things going on in her world.

From what I know, she isn’t very big here in the U.S. and I doubt my little blog will change that, but you should definitely give her latest album, On A Clear Night, a listen. I’ve owned her first album, The Sound of White, for a few years now and I never considered it that impressive. It had a few songs on it that were very good, but most of them were a little lackluster. I’ve been waiting awhile for this new album to come out, and I must say that I am very impressed with her latest effort.

Her lyrics haven’t changed - she’s still writing about complications of love, friendship, and life - but she has found a way to better display her vocal range and artistic abilities. She asserts herself much better on this album, and it’s a more adult recording that almost everyone can relate to. The album’s opening track, Where I Stood, talks about losing a love and not knowing where she stands without her girlfriend. It talks about the uncontrollable jealously she feels when she imagines another person’s hands on her ex-girlfriend’s body. The experience of ending a relationship varies for everyone, but I think one common factor is jealousy about what will come next.

Many songs stand out on the album, my favorites include Where I Stood, Sugarcane, and Angela. The album flows very well from start to finish, making the listener feel as if they are hearing a story told to them, rather than a bunch of unconnected songs.

I encourage you to give this album a listen. If you like it, buy DRM free music - do not buy this album from places (iTunes, etc) that digitally protect their music. Keep music unprotected and accessible by showing the industry that you prefer non-DRM music.

I am, by almost 10 years, the youngest person in my office. It’s kind of a shitty position to be in, because even though I am not the lowest on the ladder, I get treated like I am simply because of my age. Grunt work is often assigned to me when it shouldn’t be, and I’ve had a difficult time getting some of my directors to respect the fact that I am a college graduate and it is not in my job description to answer phones or send faxes for random people in the office or take old phones to the storage unit. That said, every Friday I can’t wait to go home for the weekend and spend some quality time with people my age.

The only problem is people my age are still in college. Most of my friends are actually in their last year, about to finish up, and they can’t wait to graduate. While I’ve never been a big partier, this weekend made it very clear to me that I am no longer in college.

I (somehow) ended up at a party at a sorority sister’s house with two of my closest girlfriends and some miscellaneous hangers on. It became very clear to me very quickly that I was the oldest person in the room. Which, to my credit, is a fairly difficult thing to do at 22. But when you’re drowning in a room of college freshmen and sophomores drinking 40s and doing the best they can to refute the statement that leggings are not pants, it’s hard not to notice the differences between you and them.

I was never big on house parties in college, and I am even less of a fan of them now than I was then. It’s just a bad mix of booze, underage kids, and drunk driving. House parties never end well, and I’m kind of glad to be (almost) done with the phase of my life that included house parties in the weekend itinerary. Bars in my rinky dinky college down are almost out of the question, with drunk jocks, nerds, and frat guys fulfilling the “creep” stereotype to the best of their abilities. I don’t feel safe going out for drinks with the just the girls because one or all of us will inevitability attract a frightening large man who just doesn’t take the hint when we say “fuck off”. But, still, I prefer the bars to house parties, because at least I’m not 3 years older than everyone else in the room. I don’t have to sit and listen to the stereo and realize that these college kids are playing music that was recorded before they were born - at least I could talk.

The scarier thing for me is kids who were born in the 90s - as in 1990 and later - are starting to attend college. Now, I may only have been alive for half of the 80s, but I’ve grown quite accustomed to knowing people born in the 80s. Now the 90s? It’s just all too weird for me. I’m not that old, but I sure am starting to feel like it. What’s it going to be like when I start grad school in the fall? Will I start hanging out at the grad student bars in town, instead of my favorite college hang outs? And what will happen if I don’t get into college? That’s a reality I am not prepared to face… at all.

Maybe I’m having trouble adjusting because I graduated college so young. I was only 21 when I graduated, which isn’t a big deal because everyone younger than me will be 21 when they graduate, but everyone who graduated with me is 22, 23, 24, or even 25. It doesn’t seem like that big of a difference, but it really is. I look back at myself when I was 19 and going to house parties and I was just as young and stupid as the girls in leggings were at the party I went to on Saturday. I’ve never been a big partier, but I’ve had my fair share of drunken debacles. I guess you never realize just how different you are from everyone you thought was the same as you until you are shoved into a room with a large group of overly drunk half naked constituents.

I always say that I miss the college life, and I do. I am a very academic minded person, I love being in school. I enjoy reading and highlighting and going over notes. Nothing makes me happier to receive a good grade on a well written or well argued paper or assignment. I belong in academia and I know this, I’m working towards becoming a professor everyday of my life. I have the sneaking suspicion that when I go back to grad school in the fall, things will be very different from the way they were in undergrad. I won’t be part of the sorority anymore, even though I’ll probably keep most of the same friends. School won’t be just school anymore, it’ll be my career - literally. I’ll be working on campus, and I’ll probably be teaching some classes. How I do in graduate school and the outcome of my years of blood, sweat, and tears (aka my dissertation) will basically depict the rest of my life. College won’t be fun anymore, it’ll be serious, and part of me is really excited for that.

But at the same time, I know I’ll never escape the peril of being surrounded by a bunch of silly 18 year old girls in leggings, cut offs, and 5 inch platform heels.

Two years ago at about this time of year, I wrote a brief essay on why I don’t celebrate Christmas*. I actually don’t celebrate any religious holiday, although I do observe some secular holidays. I feel the need to elaborate on my previous opinion and provide my readers with a little more information.

My favorite thing to say when people ask me why I don’t celebrate Christmas is: “I have integrity.” I admit, it is snarky and tends to rub my beliefs in people’s faces. It makes me sound like I think I’m better than them. Well, for some people… this is true, for other people it’s not. Regardless of my snakr, my integrity truly is the reason I don’t celebrate Christmas.

Christmas infuriates me.

People say “Christmas is about family!” or “Christmas is about giving!” Except, really, it’s not.

Christmas is supposed to be about Jesus’s birthday. It’s a religious holiday. I’m not religious, ergo I don’t celebrate. This is where my integrity comes in. I’m not going to throw my religious beliefs down the toilet because someone wants to buy me a gift to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ. Last time I checked, Jesus was a pretty low key guy - he was fairly unmaterialistic. I’d think religious conservatives would be a little offended that th ebirth of their god’s son has been turned into the most disastrous and stressful holiday of the year. You’d think they’d be outraged that his celebration is associated with mountains of credit card debt, shopping, and bitchy people waiting in line to buy the latest Coach purse or the new iPod for their teenager. But they’re not. And if they are, they aren’t doing anything about it (except for Rev. Billy). Why aren’t they doing anything about it? Because not celebrating Christmas is tantamount to terrorism: you are unAmerican if you don’t celebrate Christmas.

Here’s another thought for the religious bunch: Jesus wasn’t born in December 25th, Luke suggests that he was born in the spring or summer. You’d think religious folk would be outraged at the misrepresentation of this most sacred day, and that they’d boycott Christmas because of it. You’d think that they would form new traditions during the time of year that Jesus really was born. But they don’t. Why?

Continuing with this, you’d think liberals and non-religious folk would be outraged at the association of Christianity and its many tenets with Christmas. You’d also think that political liberals would be outraged at the credit card debt, economic struggle, and environmental hazards associated with Christmas. But they’re not either.

So why aren’t people mad about Christmas? Probably because people love getting gifts. I’d hate to break down a potentially complicated situation into something so simple, but that’s the only solution I’m left with. If conservatives aren’t sticking to the holiday’s traditional roots and liberals and non-religious people aren’t protesting the obvious problems with the holiday, then there has to be something so simple, so small, so obvious getting in the way. Sure, it could be the time you spend with your family… but if you need a quasi-religious holiday to make up a reason to spend time with your family, you should probably rethink your family structure.

I guess the most difficult part for me about not celebrating Christmas is that my view isn’t respected. If I didn’t celebrate Christmas because I was Jewish, people would nod, smile, and say “Happy Holidays”. But when I tell people that I don’t celebrate any holidays in the month of December because I’m not religious, they get confused and ask why. When I complain that my right to not be Christian is being violated because employers play Christmas carols, I get laughed at by the people I complain to. Actually, at one job, I was given disciplinary action because I didn’t play the Christmas carols CD during the shift I was supervising. They tell me that Christmas isn’t a religious holiday and that I shouldn’t be offended. They tell me I should stop being such a Grinch and just celebrate like everyone else does. People don’t even try to comprehend the reasons why I choose not to celebrate Christmas: they are so confused by it that they mock it instead of trying to understand.

The ridiculous thing is, it’s just assumed that you celebrate Christmas. I guarantee you when I go grocery shopping a week before Christmas, someone is going to tell me “Merry Christmas” - or “Happy Holidays” if they’re trying to be politically correct. While I could smile, shrug it off, and say “you, too”, I don’t think that’s very fair. I shouldn’t have to fall prey to the fact that it’s assumed I’m ignorant of the holiday’s meaning. When people tell me “Merry Christmas”, I tell them “oh, thanks, but I don’t celebrate the holidays”. Most people just smile and leave it at that, but others ask why. “I’m not religious” is usually my answer, but that tends to prompt more questions. So I’m kind of stuck in a Catch-22: I want people to respect my beliefs and my decision to not celebrate Christmas, but I don’t want to spend 3 hours trying to explain to them that it’s a religious holiday and that’s why I don’t celebrate it.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not just about religion: it’s about all the ridiculous notions included in with the celebration of Christmas. For example, “tradition” denotes that you should celebrate the holiday by giving gifts to those you care about. But we are not allowed to ask people directly what they want because it’s supposed to be a surprise. They’re left to return, discard, or re-gift the item that was given to them. In addition to this, you always have your list of “obligation gifts”: the people you give gifts to because you have to, not because you want to. These people can include anyone from your boss to someone you hardly know, but it is socially required that you give them gifts.

I guess, really, the only thing I can do is encourage people to BUY HANDMADE (from me!) this year, instead of going to your local mall and buying something heartless and made without love that is probably going to be returned, regifted, or discarded. At least when you buy handmade you know you’re supporting the artist and the loving detail, attention, and skill they put into their products.

Edit: I can’t believe people are actually criticizing Madonna and calling her a scrooge for this.
* Source for statistics, quotes, etc.

Just a small bit of house cleaning…

In order to keep things mature, adult and respectful, it is now required that you register with a valid email address before posting a comment. A minor function of this is to help remove the more frequent spam I have been receiving on the site, but the larger function is that it also allows me to get to know my readers.

I want to know who is commenting here, even if you disagree with my opinions. I don’t mind there being dissent in my comments (quite frankly, the more the merrier - give me something to respond to!), but I’d at least like to know if it is a regular reader or a random passer-by.

If you find this 5 second procedure (really, all it asks for is your name and email address, then it sends you a password) to be too painful to comment on something I’ve written, please feel free to drop me an email with your comments. Which, really, in the long run, will take more time than registering once.

I will be writing more frequently now that things are settled in and I am starting to finish reworking the entire site, and it can only benefit me to know who you are! I promise, I won’t email you or give out you information - really, who has the time?

Over the past two and a half days, my employer, the California Partnership to End Domestic Violence held its Annual Meeting in Sacramento, CA. I was extremely lucky to attend and I was fortunate enough to speak with, listen to, or eat a meal with pioneers in the domestic violence, feminist, and reproductive health movements. I listened to Ellen Pence and her stories during her speech on Monday. I got to see Ruth Slaughter accept a lifetime achievement award for opening the first domestic violence shelter in the United States. I felt privileged to hear Loretta Ross, the National Coordinator for SisterSong (a black women’s reproductive health coalition with 80 member organizations) speak on ways we can improve the domestic violence movement. It was two very exciting days spent with both new and old school feminists - both male and female - sharing ideas on how to stop violence, period. Not just violence against women in the domestic sense, but violence PERIOD.

And Ms. Loretta Ross asked us a question today, which I now bring to you:
Why are you a feminist?
Loretta’s response? (jokingly or seriously…) Because I want better men.

My response? Because I believe in equality - and not just the sense that we can treat each other equally poorly, but that we can treat each other with love and compassion and acknowledge the 8 different areas of human rights for each and every single person on this planet. Not just here in the United States, but in other countries, too. A bit idealist, but hey, that’s what my generation is around for. I believe in a world where marriage is not necessary for health care or other legal benefits. I believe that a world can exist where not only can I vote, but where my vote can be counted. Not in the electoral sense - actually counted. I believe in a world where all of the injustices that further bring down domestic violence victims can be eradicated and allow us to stop the violence against people on all levels. I believe in a lot, and I don’t think I can fit it all here… but I do believe that it is possible. All we need is a shared framework, and it has already been laid down for us by the United Nations. We just have to use it.

So, why are you a feminist?